My wrap on wrapping paper

I had hopes. High hopes. This would be the yr. The yr I show up at my MIL's house on Christmas eve with our presents already wrapped. Usually I have to ask for paper, tape, and scissors. At least this yr I'm bringing my own paper. That's an improvement right?

I hate wrapping paper. Its so wasteful, its bad for the environment. I just can't get behind it. My dad just gives people gifts in the plastic bag they came home from the store in. I agree with him in principle but I find it hard to do that either.

One yr I made my own wrapping paper with scrap paper from the company I was working for at the time. They probably wouldn't appreciate knowing that their documents were being repurposed in that way but at least I felt better about wrapping paper that yr.

I love the way a nicely wrapped present looks, lovely bow and all. I just don't love it enough.

This yr we got paper from the dollar store.

My Grandmother had a dresser full of used wrapping paper that she had salvaged from yrs past all organized by holiday and occasion. She actually ironed the paper to get the wrinkles out so no one would know. In theory I love that idea. In practice, well..........

I'll wrap them all at the last minute which I guess is about as much protest against wrapping paper as I can muster right now and enjoy the rest of Christmas.

Happy Holidays!!!

Wish and reality - 12/21/10

What I would like to do today:

-make bacon chocolate chip cookies
-make cranberry crumb cake
-make cranberry cupcakes with clementine cream cheese frosting
-make beer chicken with leeks and broccoli and mashed potatoes for dinner
-weave in the ends of Peter's Christmas sweater, same for Vivi and Siena's legwarmers
-wrap Christmas presents
-take a nap

What I will most likely actually do today:

-bake one thing
-make dinner on the fly
-do approximately 3 loads of laundry and put all the clean clothes on the folding table leaving folding till tomorrow
-vacuum
-pay bills
-try and convince Jonah to take a nap

And yes I did say bacon chocolate chip cookies. I saw the recipe a few days ago and haven't been able to get it out of my head. I mean, bacon, chocolate, cookie. what could go wrong!

My most recent pet peeve

Here it is:

Save the date magnets!

Our friends are getting married. They're a great couple. I'm very happy for them.

BUT.......................a save the date magnet is a commitment I'm not sure I'm ready to make to these two. Every time I walk into my kitchen for the next 6 months there they are, they're smiling happy in love faces staring back at me. All I want is a glass of OJ do I have to have an encounter with you two as well.

And I really don't feel like its something I can throw away. 1. its a magnet so it does have a practical value, and 2. it would be rude, right?

Whats wrong with a good old fashion card, and email? why a magnet?????

SO there it is my most recent pet peeve. thanks for listening.

Its a competition-apparently

I thought I was being a parent but apparently I'm in a competition.
I'm not competitive at all. People hate playing games with me cause I honestly could care less if I win or lose. I just want to have fun, dare I say it enjoy the experience.
But ever since I got pregnant with Jonah I feel like a lot of other moms are competitive and trying to drag me into their deal.

It started with getting pregnant. It took us more than a few months, but my view is that it happened when it was supposed to happen. Other moms: "oh one day my husband and I decided to try and we got pregnant that very night". Well good for you.

Moving on to pregnancy: I was incapacitated with nausea for 3 1/2 months. Laying in bed, only getting out to vomit, I gained weight, plenty of weight, and once the nausea stopped my back hurt, I was up all night with a kicking baby, I loved being pregnant but it wasn't the most comfortable time of my life. And don't even get me started on the hemorrhoids!
Other moms: Pregnancy was wonderful, I wouldn't have even know I was pregnant except for the belly and I didn't even have to buy maternity clothes, just kept wearing my size zero's the whole time. Well good for fucking you.

Delivery: Jonah came at 8 months, c section, not the water birth with mid wife that I had planned. Did I mention I went into labor on a Wednesday and he was born on the following Monday. I was in transition on I-95. It hurt, it hurt ALOT!!!
Other moms: just a few squeezes, I would describe it more as pressure than pain, and then poof out came my baby.
And to those moms who claim to have had an orgasm while in labor I think I speak for everyone when I say "PLEASE KEEP THAT TO YOUR SELF!!!!!"

My baby didn't sleep, there's did. They never once had a blue moment, I did.


Now all I hear is "what do you mean your child doesn't sit quietly in the corner and read all day, why can't you go to a restaurant"
Why, cause my kid is busy, he's got stuff to do.

Well let me tell you "other moms" I'm done. I'm getting off this merry go round, I'm not playing your reindeer games! I am not in competition with you or anyone for that matter. Shouldn't we be pulling together and supporting each other rather than trying to drag each other down. You won, you're the best mom out there, you're fabulous, you're tops!! Me? I'm just a normal mom trying to get through every day the best I can while taking care of myself, my family and my kid. And I think I do a pretty damn good job!

Thanksgiving - a little late

The short version:
Thanksgiving was wonderful. Uncle Tom, Lynn, Kara, Alex, Caroline, Scarlet, my Mom, Peter's parents, and Julie all came over. We had a great time!

The longer version:
I woke up on Thursday morning with the flu. Everyone loves eating food cooked by a snotty coughing person right? Thankfully Kara made a bunch of sides which were delicious! Peter hung out with the smoker and produced and amazing smoked turkey. The highlight of my cooking were the pumpkin whoopee pies if you ask me.

Jonah and Scarlet had a great time playing together. So nice to see cousins having fun.

Football was watched, food was eaten, and thankfully I didn't get anyone sick!

I'm bilinguial --Sorta of

I speak Jonah. Its a very specific language. Only 2 people speak it really. Jonah, is fluent, and I'm pretty good but I don't understand everything.

So all you "well meaning" people out there who say such helpful comments like: shouldn't he be talking by now?, or um have you had him tested?. You can all F off.

Jonah speaks, you apparently just aren't skilled enough to know what he's saying. The fault is yours really.
My kid is fine, he's great actually. He's sweet, friendly and kind, loves to share and give hugs and play.

I know your kid was reading by 6 months right, doing calculus by 2 yrs.
Maybe your kid should be tested. Maybe your kid is the one with a problem.

My amazing wonderful fabulous little boy is perfectly A OK so back off!!

damn you lands end

Hey Lands End Catalog people, you are not going to get me this yr. No not this yr people. No matter how many catalogs you send me i will not buy from you.
I will not buy your amazingly cozy looking down vests.
I will not get the fleece pajamas that make me want to curl up with my knitting in front of a fire.
i will not buy those incredible slippers that I'm sure would elevate my whole morning.

Oh no not this yr.

Are those flannel sheets.....................i may be in trouble.

less than 2 weeks to go

Thanksgiving is less than 2 weeks away and I am already feeling the stress.

I'm a planner. I love lists, crossing things off off of lists, rewriting lists, color coding lists, I'm giddy just talking about it.

But I haven't really done much planning for the big day yet. Sure I've ordered my turkey, and yes I know what one of the desserts will be, tart apple toffee pie in case you're wondering. but the rest of it is a mystery.

Not to mention all the house stuff I have to do before my family arrives. Pictures need to be hung, boxes still need to be unpacked, yes all stuff that should have been done by now considering we moved in in August but well, um, stop judging me!

I want to smoke the turkey this yr, considering we bought a smoker and all, but I've never used it before so this weekend will be the dry run. with a brisket instead of a turkey.
I have high hopes but crossing my fingers just in case.

Oh and after a set back with Peter's sweater, like 20 extra stitches.......yikes! I'm back on track after a bit of frogging. I hate frogging.

I need the cleaning fairies ASAP!!

SO much has been going on lately that my house has been completely neglected.
Its really a shambles and we have guests, Brian Reka Lina and Kaspian, coming over tomorrow so I better get cracking. All I want to do however is sit and knit. But really what else is new?

I'm so close to finishing Peter's Christmas sweater I can't stand it!

I'm giving myself 7 more minutes of me time and then its "up off the couch and get busy time!!!"

Starting with the exciting task of putting stuff in the crock pot for dinner, I know I know try to contain yourself. Then, hold on to your hats folks, I'm going to pick up all the clutter and go through the pile of mail on my dinning room table, and wait for it MOP THE FLOORS!!!! I can't believe it either all of that in one day. How lucky can one girl get.

But thankfully knit night is tonight. So it will end on a high note.

Alex and Christina got married and it was lovely. They are so well suited for each other!!

And my little man looked adorable in his suit. I hardly have any pics of it though due to his complete lack of nap and subsequent meltdown.

And is the time change messing with anyone elses kids sleep. He was doing so well sleeping till 7 on most days, now its 5:30 wake up all over again. I love when my kid says "mommy" but hearing it at 5:30 is not my favorite.

Ok its 9. Time to start my day. So long couch, hello vacuum.

does anyone ever day trick?

My guys on Halloween afternoon.

Handed out halloween candy last night for the first time and it was as amazing as I had always dreamed it would be. Growing up in an apartment building with few kids meant that the few kids there were went to their friends buildings and in my adulthood either I wasn't home for it or no one came. but last night they came in droves!! the 4 bags of candy I had bought were gone well before the last child was out.
I felt a little defeated turning our porch light out with kids still on the street but also relieved that there wouldn't be gobs of junk around.

Jonah handed out the candy, and loved putting it in the "big kids" bags. No trick or treating for him yet. I'm putting off that for as long as possible.

In other news while J napped yesterday P and I tried to rewire a lamp, I was assured that it is a super easy project, but half way through I called the company for help only to find out that they only offer help Mon-Fri. We resorted to YouTube which helped some but I have to call back the manufacturer to finish up. meaning that my dinning room is covered in lamp parts which Jonah has decided are WAY more interesting than his toys............... obviously.

My little man, oh how I love him but lets be honest I love sleep and he doesn't.

So when he started making noise at 5:20 AM I wasn't shocked but after a few minutes.....silence. He fell back asleep thankfully. I closed my eyes and waited to fall back asleep myself but at 6 I was still awake and came down stairs to knit. Why lay in bed when there is knitting to be done?

At 8AM he's still asleep. AND I'M NOT!!!! there is something so wrong about this situation.

So I guess when I declared that this week was going to be accident free I should have included illness free as well.

the j man has a double ear infection!! poor little man! guess I know why he was up half the night.

J was up most of the night................

I think it was a combo of being cold and having a super stuffy nose.

I've heard that some kids sleep later in the morning of they didn't sleep much at night, but that's just not my little one's style.

Up bright and early he was.

Thankfully I made baked french toast last night for breakfast this AM. Let me tell you, that french toast is really all that's getting me through right now.

Home, exhausted, had a blast.

Camping was great.

Steve and Irene's wedding was beautiful.


And to round out the J man accident list:
he walked into a tree yesterday and has a big bruise on his forehead and today at the wedding he put his hand on the grill and has a burn blister on his thumb. He also has a crazy snot situation going on from allergies.

Tomorrow better start a full week of accident freeness!!

camping and a wedding

Going camping, camping, camping. At least that's what we're calling it. We're staying in a cabin, a heated cabin, with a bathroom, fridge, etc. basically its a hotel but you cook outside on a grill. but hey, we haven't been camping since before the j man was born and I can't wait. the car is packed minus the camera which is somewhere but not any where that i can find.
Just waiting for Mr. P to come home from work and we're off.

8 adults, 4 kids, 1 dog.

And on Sunday we are going to Steve and Irene's wedding.

So much fun in planned for the next 2 days!!

I even made marshmallows for the smores. I plan on knitting, enjoying, and relaxing. but i will really probably be chasing my little one around as he laughs, frolics, and explores the world around him.

8:52 AM and I already feel like I've lived a whole day since I woke up.

Jonah collided with the table this morning. Blood started pouring, gushing may be a better word from his nose. First bloody nose. Poor guy. After a few minutes and 2 cool damp towels the blood stopped and after 2 sippies of milk and 2 sesame episodes he has calmed down. I look like I've done battle field surgery, my pajamas are covered in blood. I need a hot shower and some clean clothes and then I'll be right too.

So in case you are keeping track J now has:
1 black eye
5 teeth coming in
1 fat lip
and
1 swollen nose

and its only Thursday.

Is it wrong that I don't want to leave the house today? I can just imagine the stares I'm going to get in town as people see my guy and give me that "bad mother" look.

Doogie gave Wanda a pelvic!! and other things.

I've searched, and searched, I've looked for swarms of fruit flies and armies of ants but I still have not found the banana. Or the sour cream.

Yesterday as J and I were getting out of the car he wanted to hold my keys. I put him in the house, keys in his little hand and went back to the car to get groceries, etc.

After putting away everything I noticed that he wasn't holding the keys. I asked him where they were but he just laughed. That's right laughed. I asked a few more times but he wasn't telling just laughing. Then I took to searching through his toys, books, everywhere to no avail. Frustrated, convinced that I would never find them, have to get a key made for the car, how does one get a key made for a car, etc. I see something out of the corner of my eye in my bag...........it's the keys. He put them back where they go. Frankly it was kinda annoying!

This got me thinking, maybe he threw away the banana and sour cream. Could it be that the reason I can't find them is cause they are no longer here? This will drive me crazy till the end of time.

On another note, has anyone else seen black stirrup pants and scrunchies popping up in stores recently. TOOOOOOO SOON PEOPLE TOOOOOO SOON!!!! If I see one pair of pegged jeans out there I will not be able to keep my mouth shut, I may have to unpeg on the spot. You have all been warned!!

And another retro item. Last night after knitting I came home to find P watching a new channel on the tv. Its all reruns of classic shows. SO after watching the end of Wonder Years Doggie Howser came on. And what an episode it was.
Picture it: Doogie and Wanda are on their second date, she gets appendicitis and to diagnosis it he has to give her a pelvic exam. Ah they don't write em like they used to. Then for some reason he has to do the surgery etc. It was great. But my favorite and least favorite part was at the end when she asks if he saw her naked and he says only from the upper chest up and her shoulders. UMMMMM you gave her an f'n pelvic YOU SAW HER VAGINA!!!!
First what did she think he was doing down there, did she think he had his eyes closed. Second what did this teach young girls like me watching this, that your vagina isn't part of your body or something?
I know I'm probably reading too much into a Doogie episode but maybe not.

yuuuuuuuckkkkk!!!

giving j a bath this morn. he LOVES!!!!! his bath!!! he loves to splash around, play with his foam letters and numbers and other random bath toys, squeeze water out of his wash cloth. Today was no exception. he was laughing, playing, having a great time.

I look down and I see what is decidedly not a chunky bar floating in the water. YUUUUUCCCKKKK!!! poop in the tub. my brain goes into mommy clean my child, don't let him eat the poop mode.

scoop up the offending floater. drain the water. scoop up the toys and put them in the sink to be disinfected later. turn on the shower, rewash the kid.

he is no longer loving his bath. now he wants out. why is mommy going crazy, why did mommy take away my toys, why am I getting washed again, why is mommy going crazy??

He is washed and dried.

I need a piece of rosemary bread and brie!! Trust me rosemary bread and brie can fix any mommy stress moment. Its the new "mommies little helper"!!

things you don't want your baby sitter to say

I arrived home last night and the babysitter said:

"Jonah was walking around with his banana and put it down somewhere but I'm not sure where"

I have searched the house but found no banana. I could follow the inevitable smell but I have a cold and am all stuffy so it will have to be a really REALLY bad smell till it penetrates my nose. Hip Hip Hooray!! Can't wait to clean up gross disgusting decomposing banana from some nether place in my house.

And in case you were wondering I still haven't found the container of sour cream J took out of the fridge 6 weeks ago and hid some where.................

I feel like bloggers, myself included, have taken a collective vacation from blogging. It seems like everyone just needs a break from the medium or something.

Until yesterday i hadn't posted in a week or so. lots of the blogs i read have gone longer.

Oh well. We all need space some times.

My niece's bday party is on Halloween and I am so excited cause every one has to come in costume. I love dressing up!! I would love to do a family costume but i need some inspiration. any ideas for a home made mom dad and toddler costume? I was thinking of honey bees. thoughts?

we purposely did nothing all weekend. its felt like we've been going and going even on the weekends for months so we took this weekend off. hung out just the 3 of us. it was fabulous!!

2 trips to loews today just to get a tool to put together an shelf thing from ikea. ughhhhhh. i'm so sick of big box stores. why can't hand made furniture be more affordable?

now i'm actually expected to get off the couch and provide dinner to my guys. pizza anyone?

does anyone elses kid purposely make a mess just so they get to use the dust buster to clean it up. thats right....jonah purposely threw his dried cereal on the floor then ran over to the dust buster with glee pointing and saying "me me me". ok so then I am filled with a dilemma. Do I let him clean up the mess he made, which is what he wants or do I punish him for purposely making a mess by not letting him use the dust buster to clean it up?

I'm all for other people cleaning but I don't want to encourage the mess making behavior.


Where is that parent instruction book they gave me when he was born?

My yesterday

Yesterday 8AM:
Jonah goes into downstairs bathroom and locks the door. ON PURPOSE! He is knocking from his side and laughing and saying "mommy where?" "mommy where?" which is of course his way of saying "who is it and mommy come find me" at the same time. I of course am panicking over the fact that my toddler is locked in the bathroom. Thankfully Peter was home and grabbed a butter knife and got little man out lickity split.

By the way I am notorious for getting locked in the yellow bathroom in the Rhode Island house. One summer, I think I was 10 or so, I got locked in more times than I can count. One time, kara and I were there alone and it went on for over and hr and Kara was trying to throw a hose through the window so I could climb down it. But then an adult arrived on the scene and put the kibosh on the hose idea. To this day I still don't lock the door in that bathroom.

Yesterday 11:30
Driving to the Dr for J's check up. I see him in the mirror wiggling and shifting in his car seat. I'm driving down the highway in the left lane. All of a sudden I see him unbuckle his car seat. Thats right unbuckle his car seat. Little Houdini that he is. I try to get over so that I can pull off the rd and strap him back in. But there is an endless number of cars coming and no one is letting me through, Don't they know I am in the midst of a mommy emergency!!! Then he starts to get out of his seat and is climbing down, we're in the mini van. Then all of a sudden he gets back in his car seat and falls asleep, like passes out falls asleep. I guess the whole getting out of his car seat wore him out. So my first thought was "thank goodness he is at least in his seat and not walking around the back of the mini." My second thought was "great now his nap schedule will be ruined!" I finally get over and strap him back in. Then I arrive at the dr's slightly disheveled. He asks if there is anything I would like to talk about, ummmmmmmmmmmmyeah I have a few things!!! He tells me about this thing you put over the buckle of the car seat to prevent kids from getting out.

I think J woke up yesterday with a "I'm putting mommy through it today" attitude. But we both had a good night sleep and today is going to be different, right Jonah, today is going to be different!

I am who I am

A different kind of mother would have noticed BEFORE she left the house that the shirt she put her son in this morning was horribly stained. And not just with one stain or even a light colored one but some thing that looks like spaghetti sauce all over it.

A different kind of mom would have noticed.

But I'm not that mom. I'm the mom who was racing around the house today trying to get out and threw what I thought was a nice clean white shirt on my adorable child. When did I notice that he looked filthy, oh about an hr later. My first reaction was upsetness but my second reaction the one I'm sticking with is , eh whatever. that's how he looks at the end of the day anyway, why not just start out that way.

For all you other moms, you know the ones who have extra clothes in their car and are always at the ready with a wet wipe instead of just wiping their kids hands with the inside of their own shirt. To all of you.................................



I'm off to make ketchup and mustard from the "Nourishing Traditions" cookbook.

33 1/2 and other random stuff

Today is my half birthday. I am officially 33 1/2. I love celebrating my half birthday. We celebrated them in nursery school and I unlike others have never seen the reason to stop. The problem lies in the fact that not everyone thinks a half birthday is a celebratory event. Ah, one day the world will join me!
I'm pretty sure that if I sent the idea to Hallmark they would start making half bday cards, but I don't believe in cards so ya know, I wont be doing that.

Knit night, as always, was perfection.

I have once again won the mother of the yr award, given to me this time for the black eye Jonah is currently sporting. He tripped on the door jam.
How do you commemorate your little boy's first black eye? Is there a traditional gift? Is there a specific cake? I hope there's a cake.
Maybe I should invent one. We could call it "black eye pie" or "black and blue 3 layer triple chocolate cake". Do you like how I threw in triple chocolate there for no reason what so ever other than the love of chocolate.

I have been craving fall weather for at least a month now and it finally started peaking in. And except for the 3 days of 90 deg temps that we are currently experiencing I'm sure it will be back soon. Right, RIGHT MOTHER NATURE! Cause a girl can go a little batty when its 90 deg out and the trees are changing color. It makes my insides go all wonky.

Oh and the project day that I had planned yesterday was more of a theoretical project day than an actual one. Lets say it was a planning day for the real project day that is going to take place today.
Oh and amazing green couch from the 50's that was in goodwill on Monday. If you're still there today you are coming home with me!!!

Hey weather, whats up with you?

Just when I thought we were safely on our way to fall summer is busting down the door again. its going to be 90 deg today. 90! Talk about insanity.

I mean how is a girl supposed to work on her husbands wool knit sweater for Christmas on a 90 deg day. How I ask.

And I'm not sure the apple picking plans that we had for today are going to come to fruition either. And darn it if I didn't have dreams of making apple sauce and apple butter but that may have to be put on hold as well.

On the other hand it is probably a perfect day for continuing sanding and painting the thrifted furniture that we bought for our house. I super duper really want the sofa table to get done and be nicely ensconced behind my sofa where it belongs. And since only I am standing in the way of that happening I guess I better get on it.

A friend of mine has a great blog, andreastreasures.blogspot.com, where she has been showing all her amazing projects from the "Nourishing Traditions" cookbook which has inspired me to break out my copy and try some of the recipes too.

I think its going to be a project day, just not a wool sweater project day!

cafe des artistes closed, and I'm just finding out about it now

I just got depressed. it came on all of a sudden like a ton of bricks.
And whats weirder is that its over something so unexpected.
I just found out that Cafe des Artistes closed. And the worst part is that it closed 2 yrs ago. 2 yrs, and I just found out now. That fact is sort of astonishing to me.

Cafe des artes is, or was, this amazing restaurant in NY, on the 1st fl of the Hotel des Artistes which used to be an artists residence/studio space building. The walls of the restaurant were covered in amazing works of art done by the residents who lived above.
It was very pricey and the kind of place where men had to wear jackets. I only went twice once for dinner and once for drinks.
The time I went to dinner, the food was amazing and the atmosphere transported me back to its heyday.
The time I went for drinks I sat at the bar with a friend, had way too many cosmos (the one and only time I drank cosmopolitans) and ended up talking long into the night with a local NY news caster, the late Peter Jennings in case you're interested.

I only went into the restaurant twice but I walked by it and looked into its windows at that amazing art work at least once a week for the majority of my life. My cousins lived on the same street, my apt was 10 blocks away but I grew up in their apt as much as I did my own.

I would purposely walk down one street instead of the other just so I could peer into cafe's windows. I loved the idea that if you couldn't pay your bill a painting would be accepted. Those days ended long before my time but I loved that it happened at all and that I got to benefit from it. It became a ritual.

My other connection with it was that my Aunt Laura used to make their desserts with her friend Madge, that was until the health dept found out that 2 young moms were cooking out of their home kitchens and selling it to a fancy restaurant.

Aunt Laura taught me to cook, instilled in me my love of cooking, showed me that by putting love into the food that you cook for your loved ones is a way of expressing that love.

The reason that I didn't know that Cafe closed is that in 2003 Aunt Laura died of breast cancer and they sold the apartment. I miss her more than I can put into words.

I guess the reason seeing that Cafe closed 2 yrs ago upset me so much was cause it made me realize how different life has been since Aunt Laura died. I can't believe that I hadn't walked down 67th st in 2 yrs. I can't believe its been almost 8 yrs since she was here with us.

The tale of 2 toys

I've been looking for a basketball hoop for Jonah whenever we stop into goodwill or a similar store. Finally I spotted one. I casually stroll up to it so as not to attract other interest and see the $2 price tag. Yay!! I love goodwill. J claps his hands grabs the net. He likes it. All is well.
But then, he goes crazy. I mean really super insane screams of delight emanate from his little body. I get him out of the cart and he sprints with serious determination over to this:



That's right a pink baby doll stroller. He clasps it with his little fingers and proceeds to push it around the entire store with a huge smile on his face.

Now I could care less if he has a pink stroller as a toy. He rides in a stroller sometimes, he loves to push his shopping cart around this just another thing to push around and put stuff in, his girl cousins all have this toy, I mean there are many reasons why he would want this toy. And let me tell you he wanted this toy. Actually I'm pretty sure he already thought that it was his.



My choices were get him the stroller or try and pry his little fingers off the handles of this thing and considering the vice grip that he had it in................
So I got both the basketball hoop and the stroller for a whopping $5.


Jonah likes to play with both the stroller and the basketball hoop.

All is well.

Hey um coffee, you need to step up your game a bit this AM. Just saying.

Went to a fab bbq yesterday at some friends house that we haven't seen in over a yr. It was great to reconnect. And eat their amazing food, smoked brisket anyone!! Peter and I left insisting that we need a smoker ASAP.
And thankfully there were other kids for the J man to play with. Some how my 18m old, a 2 yr old, 3 yr old and 4 yr old all managed to get along and play, with out incident. In case you are wondering chasing a yoga ball around the yard is fun for all ages.

Get ready to be slightly nauseous but I finished my first Christmas present. Pickled Watermelon rind. I had never done it before but love eating it so decided to give it a try. It wasn't hard just busy work. The final product is sweeter than I would like but maybe that will change as it sits in its pretty little mason jars. I think I may try my hand at another canning project for the holidays. I'll have to go to the farmers market and see whats around.

I'm also busy knitting Peter's present and bought yarn for a few more for other people. I love buying yarn. Ah the possibilities of what can be made with those beautiful fibers. And the fact that this month is the yarn crawl is totally feeding my addiction.
Yarn Crawl: 10 yarn shops in the area, 50 miles or less, give you a 20% discount. I got some super amazing local hand dyed local sheep wool at a shop in St Michale's. Hope to go to another shop this week.

And because today I had planned to sand and paint the tables that we bought at a yard sale the world decided to rain. Don't get me wrong the rain is a good thing, we desperately need it. So I may sit on the couch and knit and drink tea and hang out instead. Sounds like a great day to me!

Have I mentioned that I love our new place?

Friends, crabs, beautiful weather, what more could a girl have asked for this past Labor Day weekend. Its so great to hang out in our fab backyard watching the kids run around and interact.
Three boys 18 months, 2 yrs, 2 1/2 yrs all getting along, for the most part. Yes there was some taking toys out of each others hands, throwing grass on each other, and other such minor things, but for the most part it was heaven for them and for me.

The first party in a new place is always a little awkward and this one was no exception but at the end of the night as Peter and I were sitting on the couch reflecting on the day and feeling incredibly blessed to have such incredible people in our lives I felt good and safe and full.

Swimming lessons start tomorrow for the J man and I . It should go well considering how much my little guy loves the water. I'm more nervous for me having to hold a squirmy toddler who just wants to GO GO GO!!

Knit night tonight, thank goodness. I need to be around the ladies who always always lift me up, make me feel peaceful through uncontrollable laughter, and remind me that creativity can be a form of prayer.

the 3 stooges aren't funny, right?

My husband has a poster of the 3 Stooges. He bought in Middle School, I don't know why. But now somehow it is in our house, AND HE WANTS TO HANG IT UP. Like on the wall, as art, for us to see and look at. Um it kind of drives me crazy.

I'm the one whose home during the day. I have to look at it.

It has been moved around the house being tried in various places, on different walls. I hate it everywhere.
Is it me? I don't think they're funny. I don't want it on the wall.

Aside from my basic - a picture of the 3 stooges isn't art- position, I don't want Jonah thinking that hitting people is funny. Its not like we are showing him episodes of the 3 S's or anything but seeing their picture has to have some effect on him later in life right?

I recently read an article about raising boys and how they need to be given the freedom to "be boys". Its defiantly a topic I need to do more research on.
Peter grew up with 4 brothers so there was a lot of rough housing going on. I'm just not familiar with that whole world. Or how I played when I was little.

We are having some friends, who also have toddler boys, over today. Boy play all over the place. Interested to see what happens.

Armor

Being a mom, wife, woman, daughter, human is amazing and full of wonder. But it is also hard, challenging, draining, and repetitive. I can't be the only one who finds figuring out what to make for breakfast lunch and dinner over and over again overwhelming at times. It has to be nutritious, taste good, something all 3 of want to eat not the same every day, etc. Sometimes I just open up the fridge and stare blankly for 5 minutes before closing it still having no idea what I'm going to do.
There's laundry, dishes, cleaning, endlessly childproofing since my kid is growing everyday.

To be honest sometimes its just too much. I wonder if I'm strong enough, good enough, doing the right things, do I even know what the right things are.

I pray, I listen for answers (or try, the listening part is not my strong suit). I reflect.


But I have my armor. I know I know we aren't supposed to be caught up in clothes or appearance, but taking time each morning to purposely think about what I'm going to wear, how the clothes make me feel, taking the time to "dress" really helps me. I try to dress "strong". I put things on that make me feel like I can conquer the world. I guess its sorta like dressing for the job you want not the job you have. I want to be strong, handle what ever comes my way, super woman and dressing that part helps me achieve that goal. Albeit more successfully on some days than on others. But hey at least it works for me on most days.

smile smile smile

Another beautiful day in our fabulous new neighborhood! I just smile being around here.
The unpacking is coming along. Some days I have more energy than others.
Today is a good day. I feel peppy and spunky and full of vim and vigor. The J man and I have already run a good amount of errands and since he doesn't seem to be in a "nap place" today I think we may go out and run some more.

Oh and in the insane kid info category: I measured J's feet 2 weeks ago to buy him a pair of sneakers. He was a 6. Tried on a few pairs. Bought a neato pair and away we went. Tried to put them on him over the weekend and they were too small. Went today and measured his feet again...............8. Tried on 8's and they fit like a charm. Is it possible that my kids feet grew 2 sizes in 2 weeks?????

Is it fall yet?

This is going to sound crazy coming from me but................I CAN'T WAIT TILL FALL. I know I know usually I start the count down to summer the moment the temp hits 65 but not this yr.

This summer has flown by. We moved mom twice, thats right twice. We moved once.
P taught summer school
For the first time we didn't take our annual summer road trip.
Maybe its a combination of those things maybe its none of them.

I also think the summer went so fast because it was so insanely hot. Usually we are outside for the summer. Hiking, playing, enjoying. But this summer we spent most of the time (when we weren't moving) sitting in front of fans hiding from the blazing sun.

It was just so contrary to our normal seasonal activity. I'm a hot weather lover. Give me a pair of shorts, a tank top and my birkenstocks and I'm a happy girl. I dream about my summer uniform all winter long.

But now I can't wait till jeans, sweaters, and wooly socks. I'm even taking a sock knitting class to get prepared!!

And let me say that a girl who lives in a super drafty and poorly insulated house from 1840 should not be looking forward to cold weather. Peter and I have spent hours talking about hanging curtains from doorways and putting plastic on windows to try and make it somewhat warmer in here in the winter.
You know it's going to be rough when all your neighbors say things like "good luck in the winter in that house".
But it just makes me want to knit yummy sweaters and blankets and cozy up with my guys.

Last night I dreamed that I could crochet. Maybe its time I learned?

Even though its going to be cold I love our house. We are still surrounded by boxes but its so nice to be in this space. I just feel much more positive here.
I'm happy.

help I'm lost in a sea of boxes!!

Hello Hello Hello.

Here we go....................

Moved in a week ago.

This is going slow.

The boxes seem to be multiplying like gremlins if you feed them way too late.

Ok enough of that.

Here's the scoop. We moved in thanks once again to our amazing fabulous and wonderful friends and family. We realize that it is completely rude to have a 200 LBS tv when you move as much as we do. Negotiations are going on about getting rid of it.

The house has no built in storage, ie no kitchen cabinets to speak of so we bought some "put together yourself" things to hold all our kitchen stuff. And in case you couldn't guess a pasty chef has A LOT of kitchen stuff!!

Jonah's play room is done. Its the only room that's done but hey its better than having no rooms done.

Next on the agenda is the kitchen.

Basically I'm overwhelmed, exhausted, and ready to be done. But I'm sure most of the world feels the same way. It's time to stand up straight, center myself, and plow through.

It will get done. A little at a time. The key is finding a balance between playing with my amazing kid, hanging out with my super duper husband, and finding some time for myself while getting the rest of it done.

my day so far

arrived home last night at 8. bleary eyed and wanting bed. jonah had other plans and wanted to stay up till 10 playing with all the toys he'd missed while being at bubbe's. in our exhaustion we left the lights in the uhaul on all night. peter just went door to door asking neighbors if anyone has jumper cables. no luck. Oh did i mention there is a serious thunderstorm going on at the moment!!!!!

The movers are coming at 10 to our other, in the process of moving into, house to unload the uhaul. peter is going to walmart to buy cables. I'm falling asleep while playing with my kid. my mother in law is arriving momentarily to play with j while we deal with movers and unpack. of course he's getting a new tooth as this all is happening because teeth only enter his mouth when 50340809 other things are going on.

making a big pot of coffee and wishing I could get a shower but thats not in the cards for today.

so i'm a dirty, tired, not in the mood lady at 8:05 am. it can only get better from here!!

I love a farm auction!!

All I can say is GO TO THE CUMPTON FURNITURE AUCTION!!!!!!

It was amazing on so many levels. The characters, the barn, the furniture. It was all worth seeing.

First off: we bought 9 lamps for $55. 2 from the 30's that have to be rewired, 2 from the '50's, and the rest from the 60's and 70's. And I love love love them. Then there were 4 not so great paintings in great frames for $10. So a totally successful shopping experience. I'll post pics soon.

Aside from that i wish I had brought a camera to capture the craziness. I would absolutely go again just not on a 95 deg day.

I'm fighting a summer head cold. I'm really anti summer colds. It always seems so wrong to have a cold when its 100 outside.

We were supposed to go to Peter's parents house today and get our stuff out of their attic, since we'll have a ton of storage space now. We put our stuff in there 3 yrs ago before we went to Hawaii. I'm not even sure whats in those boxes any more. But I'll find out soon enough.

I was way to sick and in need of a good day of rest in bed so P took J to his parents to get the stuff while I slept the day away. I've never been away from Jonah for this long and I miss him like crazy.

Re Re Re

We are moving again. and believe me when I say that I am ecstatic that we actually found a place to move to.

Its the big huge monster house. And instead of being terrified of the fact that we are moving into such a behemoth I am choosing to be excited that we will have space. Jonah will have a big ol' play room, Peter will have an office to do his school work in and a separate music/art room, I will have an art room, after all those rooms we still have guest rooms, so please come visit. you get the picture right.............its big!!

And due to the mold incident of this past winter we have no furniture, or much of anything else. Our current place was furnished so we are starting from square one, sort of. My mom thankfully has furniture that doesn't fit into her current place so we get that. and we actually bought our first piece of new furniture either together or separately. I normally love the fact that we buy used but this time around we decided to buy a comfy couch. Our last 3 used couches have been so uncomfortable that we decided to go for it!! but we still need stuff like dressers, end tables, lamps, book cases etc. We are supposed to be going to a big furniture flea market toady but it starts in 10 min and both my boys are down for naps and I'm blogging so we'll see what time we actually get there. Its only on Wednesdays and to be honest I've been wanting to go ever since i've heard about it and now I finally have a reason.
We did get stuff at yard sales last weekend, coffee tables, an end table, etc that all needs to be repainted. Yay!! break out the sander and spray paint!!!PROJECT!!!
I've already started to think about the most amazing shade of blue for one of the tables and yellow, not sure what shade pale I think, for the other.

I want to buy book cases but since all of our books are in the dump covered in mold it seems a little depressing to have empty book cases even though I know we'll fill them eventually.

When we moved into this place we were in shock after having all our stuff hauled away, and to the dump no less. We people we buy used, repurpose, recycle, etc had to actually throw out our perfectly good stuff into a landfill. It was painful on so many levels.

This house was furnished, horribly so but furnished none the less. There was a bed we could sleep on and a table we could eat at. The couch and chairs are actually wooden benches, very uncomfortable. So uncomfortable in fact that we brought the 3rd row of seats from our minivan in the house to use as a couch instead.
I knew we were only staying here for a few months so unpacking the few remaining things that we had seemed pointless. And to be fare I just didn't have it in me. We have clothes, dishes, J has his toys. But I just couldn't put the effort into making this place our home.

But this next house that we are moving into in a week and a half well i have big plans for you house so get ready. I am determined to make it OUR HOUSE. Who knows how long we will be living there. We usually move every yr sadly sometimes its more but every yr is our average. But for the yr that we are living there, (please let it be at least a yr) I want it to feel like home. I want to walk in the door and feel like we belong, its our space not some temporary lodging.

So yard sales and thrift stores watch out! I'm a woman on a mission. I will find cute beat up cheap stuff and do what has to be done to restore, refit, and repurpose, what you have so that we, Jonah Peter and Bonnie, will have a comfortable place to be at peace. loving each other, playing with each other, and spending time together.

puddle!!

I'm in the kitchen making lunch when Jonah comes up and gives me a hug.

"I love you" I say.

"Love you" he says back............

Its the first time he's said I love you.

Mommy heart melt puddle!!!!

How did I ever get so blessed?

sleep?

Why oh why for the last 3 days have I woken up at 3AM only to fall asleep around 5 AM about 15 min before the J man wakes up? I lie there thinking about too many things that can't be dealt with at 3AM and telling myself that I should get up and knit or something productive to help get back into a sleepy place but I don't get up I just keep thinking about STUFF.
Not helpful.

I always think of the best blog posts right before I go to sleep. They're funny, poignant, have a topic, and aren't my usual rambling free thinking sort of thing. But then I fall asleep and the fabulous blog post is gone as well. I suppose I could get up and jot a thing or two down but that would involve getting out of bed and that's not going to happen. especially since I'm getting so little sleep as it is.

Hopefully J will take a nap today and I will join him. Yesterday he declined my nap offers.

Stitches come out today, YAY!!!!!

Knit night ladies thank you thank you thank you!!!!!!

recently I think that somehow jonah and his cousins got together and decided that they would all start waking up around 5AM. Lina, Vivi, Siena, and Jonah what is up with you guys? Sofia and Cali appear to have politely declined to join in in the shenanigans!

Mom found an apt.

We still have to find a place to live.

One house is huge and much more than we need but may be all that's around to take.

The other one we saw is tiny and probably too small but we applied for it anyway, so far no response. Maybe its for the best.

If we end up renting the mongo house feel free to come stay over. We'll have the room!

Wish we could find a happy medium, the search continues as the end of our lease looms.

Had a great time at the Jersey Shore for the weekend. It was great to get away, relax, and recharge. This summer seems to be flying by.

I'm trying to take time and slow down and relish these hot humid days, come winter I'll be wishing I did.

Its raining!!!! For months its felt like the rain always passed us by. Even as recently as yesterday when all the surrounding towns got it we were skipped. My garden has been pleading with the sky for a good down pour, I've been doing rain dances, and finally today it all paid off.

I started to open the door to put clothes on the line and saw RAIN!!!

And let me say that it better cool things off because it has been down right miserable round here recently and I could use a day below 90!

We have decided to keep renting since we haven't found "the house" to buy yet. Of course now we have to look at rentals which is no less time consuming or aggravating. Saw a nice apt in wilmington yesterday but its more for a single person or a couple with out kids. It just wasn't right for us. so the search continues.

I think a house is a better fit for us. Going from a house to a small apt wouldn't be easy.

Moving again!!! I've decided to have a positive attitude about it. I could wallow in the whole "I can't believe we are moving again, I have to pack again, its only been 7 months, if feels like I just unpacked, are you kidding me we are moving again" thing but nope not me I'm going to be positive, think of it as a new and wonderful experience and be excited. At least thats what I'm telling myself.....

Attack of The Killer Ants

Well, they aren't really killer ants, but maybe they are since they are slowly killing my spirit. They are everywhere. Apparently, ants come inside when the weather is warm and considering that it is !@!$@#$#%$% HOT outside they are invading our home. I usually get such pleasure from cooking but now I don;t even want to be near the kitchen let alone in it. I don't even want to think about it. It upsets me so.
We don;t want to spray any ant killer cause we don't want to breathe in poison and all but the ant motel things don't seem to be working. And I've tried all the natural remedies that I can find. bay leaves, cayenne, etc.

today is our 3 yr wedding anniversary. according to the traditional wedding gift thing I should be getting Peter something leather. for some reason all i can think of is getting him a pair of assless chaps as a joke but where does one get a pair of assless chaps on short notice in semi rural md? now if we still lived in ny no problem!!

J is getting a new molar. why do baby's need so many teeth? he's a pile of crankiness and breaks out into screams out of no where. poor guy. i think baby's should max out at 10 teeth. any more than that is excessive, right?

I have been MIA for a while, the reasons are too numerous to recount.

But I'm back. For now at least.

So we are smack in the middle of a heat wave, supposed to be 101 today. i usually hate air conditioning but 101.......crank it baby. We have air conditioners in our bedroom and jonah's bedroom but the downstairs and rest of the house is without. It gets insanely hot downstairs and Jonah's little cheeks get beet red. i try to keep him up in the bedroom but he wants to be in his play room. we are trying to come to some sort of compromise, or I should say I am. toddlers aren't great with compromise.

my mom is moved out. i don;t know how it all got done but it did. Jeff and Sharon are total rock stars without them it never would have happened.

Off to lay down while the little one sleeps.

moving time again

Tomorrow the packing begins. But for once we are not the ones moving. My mom is moving out of the apartment she has lived in for the last 35 yrs.
She has 2 weeks to move out and the new owners move in. So Peter, Jonah and I are going to NYC to pack up every thing she has accumulated over a life time.

It seems so surreal. The place was on the market for a yr and a half. at times it seemed like it would never sell. But it has, thankfully. Having to pack it all up is the obvious downside.

I'm happy for her of course. She needs a change. Is ready for a change. But this is the place I've grown up in. When I came home from the hospital I came home to this place. This is what I consider home in so many ways. We move around so much that having this apartment as a constant helped me not to lose it sometimes.

Major memories in the apartment (the short list):
-Getting my first big girl bed. (It was a canopy bed)
-Making pancakes with my dad in the kitchen, before we remodeled
-the Messnick's bringing me my cat Francis. I chased her all around the apt. I don't think she ever forgave me
-Peter proposing in the den
-walking in the park with my mom when we trained for the half marathon
-the summer Jaclyn, Tania, Allison, Brooke, and I all lived there, total insanity
-the blowing up of the macy's thanksgiving day parade balloons and all the parties we had to watch them being blown up
-my Hawaii themed bday party (only Kara will really appreciate this memory)
-eating dinner practically every night with mom during middle and high school
-leaning to cook
-when the grandfather clock got delivered and I helped put it together


Peter and I have moved 8 times in 3 yrs (and have to move again in August) so we are pretty much pros at this point. This one is going to be trickier though since we have to help mom get rid of stuff which she will be very reluctant to do!! I had an argument with her a few months ago over her saving her biology notes from college. i lost......

Just have to remember to be supportive, understanding and patient. Oh and that I can't control everything. not one of my strong suits.

I missed jury duty twice, more like ignored 2 jury duty notices. so i got a summons that I had to appear in court or get a $10,000 fine and/or 10 days in jail. I get to court and the judge is a very old man who is not so happy with me. He's about to pronounce sentence and I'm trying to figure out where I am going to get $10,000 from when he says "Hey, look at that" huh, what is he talking about? He asks if the address listed on my paper work is correct. It is I tell him. He explains that when the building was built in 1926 he and his family moved in to not only the same building but the same apartment. That's right this judge and I both grew up in the same apartment. Had the same bedroom. Created memories in the very same place. There I was in my 20's looking at a man in his 90's whose life mirrored mine in a way.
Now I am the one moving out. New children are moving in. They will fill the space with their memories. They will have a height chart in the kitchen, fall while roller skating around the dinning room table, and fall asleep to the hum of the city street outside. I wish them as many happy memories as I have had in the apartment. Maybe one day I'll meet them in some random way and the circle will continue, the beat will go on.

Where are you home?

Ok people. when you list your house for sale
1. don't list it as a 3 bedroom when its really a 1 bedroom and 2 closets. A bedroom has windows!
2. Don't say a house needs "TLC" when there is a gaping hole in the roof that birds are flying through!
3. A house on the main highway should not be listed as "nestled in a cozy quite location"!

Dream house I know you are out there. Somewhere..................

I feel like I've looked at every house in the area. But I know the perfect one is just around the corner.
I'll keep looking for you house. One day my family and I will be snuggled around your fireplace. Happily ensconced in our beautiful spot in the world.

I need something. am searching for something. don't know what it is. its so close I can almost taste it. It's right out there. If I stretch my arm out maybe I can touch it.

The thing is I have everything I need and could want. Wonderful husband, baby, family, life.

But yet there is something. Something just out of reach but it is almost here. around the corner and to the left.

I'm waiting. Whatever you are I'll see you soon.

Oh and kid who purposely threw sand in my baby's eyes yesterday, if you weren't 4 I would have had some choice words for you and maybe a few actions!!! More likely a stern talking to, I am a pacifist after all..............

wives, plural

the president of South Africa has 3 wives is engaged to another and talking about taking a 5th. Totally outrageous!! The leaders of nations should be role models and I don't know about you but people who subjugate women are not role models in my book. I know i shouldn't be ethnocentric but 5 wives, hell 2 wives is 1 too many!!! any more than 1 is the same conversation. And let me just say that when the 2nd wife heard that he was taking a 3rd she was furious. he made her apologize and give him a goat as part of her apology. she has nothing to apologize for. but really she doesn't have much of a leg to stand on being upset about multiple wives since she is the 2nd and all. but the fact that she had to give him a present makes me livid. the whole situation makes me livid.

first the olympics were in China, now the world cup is in South Africa. no where is perfect i know but we can be making better choices people. come on!!! this had tainted the world cup for me.

Dust buster you are my new best friend. Sorry old best friend (shark steam mop). I still think you're great and all but did you see how dust buster took care off all the crumbs Jonah left on the floor?

Give me an M

Hello Monday. I welcome you with open arms. For with your arrival brings us one day closer to Peter being done with the school yr. True he is teaching summer school but its only half days and Jonah and I get to have him for the other half. This whole work thing takes my darling husband away from us far too much!

Spent the weekend looking for a couch. The never ending saga of looking for a couch, or so it seems. One day we will find one and it will be comfortable and nappable and perfect for our needs, my feet will be able to touch the ground when I sit down on it, etc.

I watch the live cam of the oil spill somehow trying to get my mind around what is going on but either I am too limited or the situation to vast for that to happen. I sit in shock and amazement. Trying not to look at the birds covered in oil but not able to look away either. I can't stand it. What are we doing......................

So Monday come forth. Wrap me in your Mondayness. Lets go, lets see what you have in store for us. Will it be the co-op, picking dandelions for dandelion jam, or maybe something totally unexpected? Monday give me your best!!

Is it me?

I had a confrontational day today.
I asked the check out woman at the grocery store how she was and she snapped back. Basically saying how she is is none of my business.
I had a testy exchange with a nurse at the dr.'s office.

It was just one of those things I couldn't seem to shake.

Was it something that I was putting out into the world or were people just bummed to be back at work after a holiday weekend. Maybe it was both.

All I know is that I am done interacting with people for the day.

If you planned on calling me to chat I hope it can wait till tomorrow!!

Jonah figured out how to take his diaper off and you know, throw it across the room or wear it on his head. He does this with or with our poop in it.....

AWESOME!!!

no nap

Jonah is on a nap strike. which of course made him a complete and total disaster today. the 2 teeth he's cutting didn't help matters. so up since 4:50AM. he ran around the house and yard all day yelling at furniture and trees and taking things out of one place and putting them some where else. he has his own organization system i guess. he has also been famished all day. he just kept wanting more food. i obliged of course. but man he was putting it away.

so now he is in bed. thankfully!!

I plan on sitting on my ass and doing nothing for the rest of the evening.
dishes I'm talking to you here. I hope you and the dish washer didn't have any plans for later cause you guys aren't getting together tonight!!

Funny Vs Dangerous

Let me set the scene:
I am sitting at the kitchen counter drinking coffee reading the big business owned media's version of what's going on in the world. Jonah is watching Sesame Street. Peter has already left for work.
I'm knee deep in an article about the repeal of Don't Ask Don't Tell and I hear hysterical laughter emanating from my child. Now he loves his SS but he's seen this video 100 times so I doubt it can be from something Grover did. I go over to see what all the hub bub is about and find him sitting on the bass drum of his drum set. How he managed to push the whole thing over with out me hearing a crash I do not know. But needless to say he thinks sitting on the drum is unbelievably funny and frankly so do I. Then he takes it one step further and stands up on the drum, (see photo #2). Ok here is where being a parent gets tricky.
He is having fun, he is purposely doing something to be funny. I love when he does that. He has his Daddy's sense of humor. I want to encourage this type of behavior but....Standing on a drum and jumping up and down is 1. liable to break it and 2.dangerous.
"We don't jump on our toys, do we" I ask. (Peter and I try not to say "No" unless its a serious danger situation.) "Look at you. How much fun. Let's stand the drum set up again and play with it using the stick now." Nothing. The kid looks at me like I'm crazy. He's jumping on a drum while watching Sesame Street and I expect him to stop. What am I nuts? I reach out to pick him up and guide him in an action change.

And then.....CRASH! He tumbles backward. Thankfully he landed on a stuffed animal. He wasn't hurt at all but was a little shocked. A sort of "I was just having the best time, why am I on the floor now" expression.

We pick up the drum set together and start banging away. Smiles, fun, then he tries to climb on top of it.

Ok. So should I have removed him immediately from sitting on it as soon as I saw the situation? Should I have stopped it when he stood up? Should I not have laughed?

I want to encourage his creativity and independent actions. I want him to feel free to repurpose things. A chair isn't just for sitting, put a blanket over it and its a fort kind of thing. But I don't want him to get hurt in the process.
He's a kid, there will be injuries. I understand that. But when do I step in and be preventative and when do I step back. Is it irresponsible of me to let him do something that may end up with a boo boo?

Can you play your shirt?

Pictures from Peter's Bday BBQ. His birthday really isn't till the 27th but we celebrated early. The new grill worked like a champ. and beer, bocce, and brownies were enjoyed by all.

I gave him a shirt with a playable electric guitar built in it. YOu can find it here: http://www.thinkgeek.com/tshirts-apparel/interactive/c498/zoom/

He hasn't really had one to play since the mold made him get rid of guitars, banjo, ukulele, drums, etc. I thought this would be a good temp till he gets a new one. It has this little amp you hook onto your belt. It was really funny. And thankfully he liked it.

I have a problem of getting presents for Peter that he doesn't really like. The problem is that I listen to him. He says he wants something, I file that knowledge away for a later date, then I get him the item for Christmas, bday, etc, but it turns out it was more of a spur of the moment "I want that" than an actual one. But I think after 5 + yrs of being together I've learned. At least I hope I have.

Jonah continues to amaze me. Tonight he picked up his PJ's and put them around his neck and pointed up the stairs. Um so you want to go to bed? Yeah he says. He says Yeah not yes. Put them on him and away he went. couldn't believe it. He is cutting 2 teeth at the moment so maybe that's why he is extra tired. I just hope he doesn't wake up at 4AM!!

The Ice Cream Run!!

We live in a small town. It used to be all one but in the 1800's they made a canal smack through the middle so now there is North and South. North is all residential and South is where the shops, restaurants, B&B's etc are. In order to get from N to S you have to drive over a very very tall bridge. But....in the summer you can take a 3 minute ferry ride from one side to the other. It runs mostly on the weekends. But thursday, well on thursday night they have the Ice cream run, On the S there's a fabulous Ice Cream shop that uses local ingredients and milk and cream from a diary on the outskirts of town. It delicious and delectable. And you get a discount on your scoop if you take the ferry, $1 a scoop, yes please!!

Last night we kept Jonah up past his bedtime so we could do the Ice Cream run, and let me just say it was well worth it. And not just because I got adorable pics of Jonah in a life jacket.

He was sleepy but rallied like a champ, especially after we let him have his first taste of ice cream. One lick was defiantly not enough for our little boy.

It was so good I couldn't stop for one moment to take a photo of said deliciousness!! Don't worry I'm sure we'll do it again!!

Oh and the bbq is back on. scamper scamper scamper, things need to find a place to hide while other folks come in!

Meaning to clean

So I sorta cleaned the house yesterday. Lets call it the beginnings of cleaning the house. Listen, I would love to be a great house keeper, I really would. I get my lack of skills from my parents. They believed that a house doesn't have to be super duper organized and spic and span. Playing, reading, cooking are much better uses of time than obsessively cleaning. I agree but then when we are having people over I have to scramble to declutter, put away the mound of clean clothes that are residing on the dinning room table, and pick up toys.

One set of my cousins are the crazy about cleaning their houses type. Everything in their homes is white, couches, carpet, counter tops, etc. When my mom and I would go their we would be afraid to sit down for fear of staining the chair. When you eat they sit next to you and wipe away crumbs. It borders on the ridiculous. But that's how they are happiest. It's just not for me.

I recently watched a documentary on the Shakers. (This is going to be a really simplistic explanation) They believed that you should do everything perfectly because everything you do should be to glorify God and by doing it perfectly it would glorify Him. I understand their point and all but I'm imperfect therefore everything I do is going to be imperfect. And I don't think my imperfect actions glorify God any less. So as I hurried along finding places for XYZ I kept thinking of the Shakers and their work ethic. I decided that doing my best not doing it perfectly but my best was really the greatest thing I could do.

Then Peter comes home last night and says that the party is off, to be rescheduled at a later date. Time conflicts and all. I was relieved, elated, and sat down to knit. Which is what I wanted to be doing all along.

FYI

The pity party is over folks. Nothing to see here.

I'm back on track!!!

Today Today Today

Today is one of those days.
I woke up determined to have a great day even though I have to clean the whole house and not a normal clean the house but a we're having people over for Peter's birthday on Saturday kind of clean, you know a company clean house. I have never nor will I ever claim to be a good house keeper. I don't like doing it but it must be done is my attitude. We always have clean dishes and clean clothes but there is usually a pile of dirty ones ready to take their places.
SO I set out today to do the million things on my to do list that I don't really want to do. And I decided that I was going to have a good attitude about it!!

That was this morning.
Now its the afternoon. I got a lot accomplished but.....I love my child, he's the most wonderful fabulous interesting person, however, today he is having a serious TODDLER DAY. Mom's you know what I mean. He just is being the fabulous little boy that he is with a major dose of stubborn, my way or I'll scream mixed in.

According to Jonah: why only draw on paper-why not the stairs, and crayons aren't only for drawing-eating them is super fun too, and I'm going to sit in a mud puddle while mommy puts the clothes on the line and scream like crazy and have a major fit when she wants to take off my dirty clothes before going in the house.

Nothing terrible, just normal kid stuff. I love that he's opinionated. I love that he's curious, determined, independent. I think its getting to me cause I need to be cleaning and don't want to (did I mention that?) and really would much rather play in a mud puddle with him.

Fingers crossed that a nap is going to take place!!

Knit night tonight will set me right!!!

And by the way, saw Erin yesterday who I haven't seen in 11 yrs. I don't feel old enough to have friends that I haven't seen in 11 yrs. Thanks "old friend"!!

Punk Rock is here to stay!!

Some mornings I just can't get it together. This usually happens on a Monday. I'm tired, I don't feel like anything, I just want to stay in bed under the covers for the foreseeable future. Coffee has no affect, inspirational words have no meaning. But life must take place, breakfast must be made, children have to be played with, life must take place.
In these all too frequent instances I reach in my back pocket and pull out my secret weapon......I put on a punk rock outfit.

Back in the day, as you can see from the above picture I had a more rocker edge. That blue spiky hair is still my absolute favorite way that I have ever had my hair, bar none!!!

Now when I say I put on a punk rock outfit it is a toned down more muted affair. Joan Jett and Joey Ramone would happily pass me by in Walmart (were he still alive) without ever uttering "there goes a rocker chic". but it is about as puck rock as I can get these days.

It makes me feel good. Strong. Full of life.

And in reality punk is much more about that than the clothes anyway. the movement started to die when it became about the clothes. There are many people who I think are punk rock that would never be decked out in a mohawk: the Dali Lama, Jesus, Maya Angelu, Dorothy Day, my mom. They don't care about the establishment, they don't care what is current. They do care about what is right and wrong in the world and look for ways of changing it. They focus on the collective not themselves.

I may not be the bar going, up all night partying, sleeping till 3PM, girl in her 20's but the essence of her spirit still resides inside of me. I can call on her any time and she is always there to say "fuck you negativity. I'm a rocker chic and nothing is going to get me down"!!

Friends Seminary Class of '95!

Yeah that's me in high school. Had a slight James Dean obsession...and for the record I thought I looked FABULOUS!!!!

This weekend is my 15 yr high school reunion, which makes me feel incredibly old.
(I'm not feeling grammary today)!

Ok so I feel old.

One bright spot is that I get to hang out with my best friend from high school Emily. We may not talk every day or every month for that matter but when we get together its like we are 16 again hanging out on her bedroom floor talking about the most important dramas of life.
Now with Emily I'm happy its like we're back in high school, for the rest of the folks I'll be seeing the same thing will be true but in a not so good way. That's my fear anyway.

I went to one of those alternative, progressive private schools in NY. Where every one was super cool (except me) and tried to out weird the person next to them. Angst ran ramped. It was artsy and fashion forward and ultra something that I never understood.
I was the girl who didn't go out much, wasn't in the know, and certainly wasn't followed. But while I had my "I wish I was more like....." moments I didn't have a pity party or anything like that. My school was actually perfect for me in many ways. It had this major focus on community service and I got to volunteer in some amazing places. Not many schools would let you take off the month of May your senior yr and miss finals to go volunteer in Ethiopia.
I loved it but lets not forget it was high school so I hated it too.

At our 10 yr reunion I got in trouble for talking during meeting. Ah it brought me right back.
Peter came with me, we were just dating then, but he came and immediately wished he hadn't. He commented that I reverted into a high school version of myself and ......he didn't think that we so great. I told him that the same thing happens to him when we hang out with his old friends and its just part of life.

This yr it will be me, p and the j man. I know some of us have gotten married in the last 5 yrs, some of us have kids. I look forward to seeing the changes but I'm sure I will more than anything see the sameness.

These people have seen me at my worst: the Ani/Bonnie incident, and the 8th grade trip, and at my high school best. My fashion foibles: 20 necklaces at a time (what was I thinking), my prom dress (again what was I thinking), and the times when I looked semi ok, examples of those are much harder to think of.

Great times were had even if they didn't seem great at the time: again I'm blanking on examples, but I'm sure we had some......YSOP, Ex-Ed, (feel free to fill in the blank here)

So I'm going back to high school at 33 and taking my family along for the ride. I plan on gossiping, making fun of people, and loving every minute of it even though I'll act like I hate it at the time. Just like I did when I was actually there.

Single stream recycling starts in our town tomorrow and I couldn't be more excited!! No more storing everything in our laundry room and then hauling it to the dump. Now I can just put it all out on the curb every other friday and away it goes. I love recycling. I love the idea of it, the purpose of it. I love that it allows me to not feel so badly about buying certain things due to the packaging because I know it wont end up in a landfill.

Knit night once again was perfection. women of all ages sitting around discussing the world and our lives while creating amazing needle crafts at the same time. so inspiring, so important. community community community. while we each create something individually we are creating something collectively. ladies you raise me up!!!!

Watch the doc "Beautiful Losers". You can down load it for free on Netflix. It shows one of P's favorite pieces of art in Coney Island......

i love my boys!

cooking dinner for my guys. spinach pasta with brussel sprouts and home made sauce with home grown basil. roasting turkey from the farm down the road. j seems to have been born a vegetarian. he doesn't really eat meat which is fine by me and p. we have both been vegetarians in the past and discuss going back at least twice a yr.

waiting for p to get home so I can go to knit night. i love knit night so. but he is stuck in his advisers office trying to figure out his school schedule which is super important of course.
not that my knitting is unimportant or anything but clearly school gets priority over my hobby.

saw more houses today. um is there anywhere to live that's in our budget and fabulous? maybe one will work out but it will need work, lots of work I fear. and uh lets be honest p and I don't know how to do that kind of stuff. our wonderful families would of course pitch in but we can't rely on them to do all of it.

jonah loves music and watching him dance makes my heart happy.

find me a home

So um I'm a total dork. Any one who reads this...all 3 of you....knows this.

I had to break up with my Realtor. There is nothing wrong with her, I just found her completely and uterly annoying. Every time I had an appointment to go see a house with her I dreaded it. Isn't the stress of making the biggest purchase of your life enough without the added stress of having to hang out with someone you can't stand in order to do it?
Ok so by break up I mean I stopped calling her and have been ignoring her calls. A guy once did that to me and I got the message (eventually) I'm hoping she will too.

I decided to go on trial house viewings with 2 new realtors. One yesterday and one today. So here is why I'm a complete dork. I am sorta nervous to meet these new people. I'm spending way to much time thinking about what to wear, what will they think, etc. The fact of the matter is that as long as I buy a house they could really care less which pair of jeans I wear.

Susan, who I met yesterday, was nice and plain spoken. She really seemed like she was trying to get a feel for what kind of house we're looking for. Today I meet Jim.

Maybe one of these days I'll meet the right house cause really that's the point of the whole thing right?

Post Mothers Day Ramblings

Photo of Me, Mom, Peter, Jonah, Julie, Mike, Rosemary, Lauren, Mike, Sofia, and Cali after the Mothers Day Breast Cancer Run/Walk in Philly.

Had the most wonderful Mothers Day Weekend!! Friday my mom came down from NYC. Peter came home with flowers and wine. Love that man!! Had an amazing seafood feast collaborative effort dinner. Rock fish, shrimp, the last of my first homemade pesto, eggplant and sweet potato fries.

Saturday mom and I went to the town yard sale. Scored some major finds. Cast iron corn bread mold, 6 glasses with birds painted on them, 14 kid friendly videos, some pilsner glasses, 2 chairs and a couch!! Photos to follow.
The couch is hideous but i'm hopeful that something can be done to change that. the chairs are outdoor ones that i am going to re purpose into indoor ones. They need cushions and some feet.

Then me, mom, peter, and jonah went to Newark, DE for some errands and walking around. Also a stop by the local fair trade store to celebrate fair trade day with some free fair trade chocolate and coffee. I'm not one to pass up free chocolate or coffee ya know!!!
Mom loved the store. The re purposing is amazing and I may have to splurge on the soda can top purse for Alex and Christina's wedding. I'll justify it by the fact it was made by street children in Brazil.

Then off to dinner at the Yacht Club in Chesapeake City. Ummmmmm so it was AMAZING!!!!! South Beach took a vacation this weekend. Escargot in hazelnut butter for my app. followed by filet mignot smothered in crab royal. which is crab and melted cheese. Did I mention we also got baked brie drizzed with raspberry sauce.
It was a super amazing meal.
We went to bed at 9:30!! Food coma all around.....

Sunday woke up at 4AM. Let me repeat that on mothers day I woke up at 4AM. I've heard that some mothers sleep in and get breakfast in bed on mothers day. But I woke up at 4AM so we could be out the door by 5:30 to get to Philly for the Breast Cancer walk. Lynn and Tom I should have taken you up on your offer to sleep at your house so I didn't have to get up so early. Next yr I'll be there!!
We all got up ate breakfast and were out the door by 6AM. Only 30 min late which for us is pretty impressive. Made it to Philly and drove around forever for parking but got to the walk on time. It was me, mom, peter, jonah, peter's mom, sister, and brother, his brother's father in law and his daughter Cali. Cali slept the whole time. Jonah did not! He did ok in the stroller for the first 2 miles but for the last one was not having it and Peter carried him. It was 40 deg and windy. Not the best weather but we had a great time chatting, walking and being inspired but all the amazing people around us.

Then went to Mike's wife's families house for brunch. Her family is large and welcoming. We have differnt opinions as to what is a child appropriate movie however. For example I DO NOT feel that Step brothers is appropriate and they do. My sweet baby boy heard more curse words in 2 hrs then he has heard in his entire life. And I am certain that _ _ _ _ _ on drums is going to be planted in his subconscious for the rest of his life!

Mom, peter, me, and jonah left and went to Pat's to share a cheese steak. can't leave philly with out a cheese steak, when you've given your diet a vaca that is.

took mom to the train station and left for home. We had all been up since 4, including the j man and we were spent. J and I took a little nap in the car but poor peter had to drive.

Decided to go to sushi for dinner to complete my fabulous weekend. FYI always ask what brand the wine is cause $7.50 for Kendal Jackson pretty much sucks but the sushi was great and the prefect end to mothers day.
Came home and had to cover my garden due to a frost last night. Frost in May, not cool mother nature, not cool. But when I went out this morn to uncover my beautiful garden the watermelon had doubled!! And our first tomato decided to pop out. Its green and adorable. Its supposed to get down to 40 tonight and I may cover again. The strawberries however I don't think are going to make it. That is 2 yrs in a row that the strawberries have died. I don't know what I'm doing wrong but it makes me want them even more.......

So we were all exhausted and delirious. Peter put J down and P and I were in bed at 9. Fast asleep, blissfully asleep. 11:30 screams, baby boy screaming, crying, inconsolable, tears, did I mention screams...the piercing screams of a sweet baby having his gums ripped open by a new tooth. I rocked, I gave milk, I hugged, kissed and snuggled. Ambesol did nothing. Of course we had no motrin or tylenol because of the recall and nothing was working. At 12:15 P ventures out to the all night store to try and get something anything to help our baby. He found one bottle of generic motrin left on the store shelf and raced home with it. By this point I had gotten Jonah quieted down to a whimper by a combination of milk, ceiling fan and the lion king. Peter walked in carrying the meds like a golden egg and we gave it to little man. Then we had a discussion about whether the lion king is an appropriate movie for him to watch due to the hyenas.
If anyone has any thoughts on this topic I am curious. I think its on ok movie, Peter doesn't. And let me say that it did calm j down. But we put in Babe. I was terrified that changing the movie would send him into hysterics but he was fine watched a little of the film and went back to sleep. Then so did we.

But 6AM came and he was back up. That's around his usual wake up time.

And now today is in full swing with laundry and cleaning.

My weekend was wonderful. I didn't change a diaper and Peter did the majority of work.
Thank you Peter and Jonah for such a great Mothers Day!!! And thank you both for making me the mother that I am!!! I love you!!

grateful

things i am grateful for today:
1. my wonderful supportive husband
2. knit night
3. jonah's love of dancing to any and all music including church hymns
4. my garden
5. my laundry line
6. the sound of birds at 5AM
7. other mom blogs
8. my incredible family
9. sushi
10. the view of the water from my house

SC

South Carolina for Collin and Allison's wedding. All was lovely. Food, people, weather, etc.
Got a ton of knitting done on the car ride. I think we should drive 10 hrs every weekend. I'd get so much done! Finished the owl sweater vest and the soaker pants that I made for J. He looked so cute in the vest at the rehearsal dinner. Is it wrong that I love to see him in stuff that I've made him? Now I'm starting to make a bag and then felt it!!

I never feel like I take good pics of the stuff I've made. If anyone has a suggestion I would appreciate it.

Went to the beach. a wonderfully windy day. Flew a kite. J walked forever. He picked up his first sea shell. I immediately made a mental note to pick it up whenever he dropped it and save it forever but after 10 min or so he handed it to me. As if to say "here I know you want this". That little boy knows me so well!

Peter looked great in his suit, J looked adorable in his suit, I had a fun time dressing up in my fancy dress. But after 30 min the heels came off and the berks went back on.

Made hummus for the first time last night. A little lumpy but not bad overall. J and P ate it up.

split lip

Dear Fire House:
I hate you when you decide it's time to test the sirens on your engines at the exact moment I finally have gotten my sweet baby boy to sleep.
But I love you when my baby is gushing blood from his mouth and I only have to run 20 ft to get medical attention.

He split open the piece of skin that connects your upper lip to your gum. No stitches needed. He's fine. I'm not sure about me.

Jonah's a walker, Jonah's a walker. That's right I said it Jonah's a walker!!!

It started last week in earnest and by the weekend he was unstoppable. He is so into exploring everything. Its like he's in a hurry to grow up RIGHT NOW!!! And get super upset when he can't do everything that he wants at the exact moment that he wants to do it.
Now if he stumbles he wails for a few seconds then carries on. Or if he is carrying a big box across the living room and he drops it he acts as if the world is ending for 2 seconds and then picks it back up and keeps going.
We are also having some communication difficulties. I haven't spoken baby in a bout 33 yrs and he isn't quite fluent in english yet. But we're working it out.

He is already smarter than I am.

I am almost done knitting the soaker pants for him. They are super cute. I decided however that I should knit him a sweater vest to wear to Collin and Allison's rehearsal dinner. The pattern is adorable. I just hope I can get it done in time. pictures of both soon................I hope!!

Handle Bar!!

Peter decided to shave off his "winter beard" and got a little creative in the process. Who doesn't like a handlebar mustache I say. Oh wait me that's who. Don't fret, this was just a stop on the shaving train and he now has a nice clean shaven face.

I am almost done adding prices to the list of all of our STUFF. Then on to the list of shoes and books and then off the the lawyer they go.
Its rather depressing having to assign dollar amounts to things that are priceless. Priceless to me at least. My grandfathers wallet, the key plate my dad made me in the pottery class that he took, the drum I bought in Ghana, you get my point.

I will be happy when the lists are over and in someone elses hands. so will Jonah. He doesn't understand why mommy is on the computer so much these days and not on the floor playing with him where I belong!!!

I have hardly gotten to do any knitting so the soaker pants for the j man are taking longer than I thought. There is no way they will be ready for Easter. Oh well. As long as I get them done and they fit him I'll be happy.