Monday, November 23, 2009

MOLD MOLD MOLD.
its so hard to say goodbye to pretty much everything you own but when its all contaminated with toxic mold it becomes a reality. maybe that's why this is happening. too much junk had been acquired and the only way i was going to get rid of it is if I absolutely had to. and now i do.
throwing away birthday cards etc from my grandma, and others that I loved but that are no longer with us is excruciating, i'm just trying to remember that they are just pieces of paper but the sentiments written on that paper is full of love and happy memories, memories that i hoped to share one day with my child when i told him of such folks, now i think it will be harder for him to get to know them and it hurts so much that he will never know them,

A few things we are hoping to get cleaned if we can afford it, but the rest must go.
I am waiting on the professional clothes cleaners to arrive and take away all of that.
Spent the weekend making an itemized list of everything that we own. Thankfully some wonderful people came to help. We didn't finish but are nearly there.
It is hard to face how much STUFF one accumulates when it is written down, I absolutely don't need 64 shirts, there is just no need, and why my husband has 57 pairs of socks I will never know, especially since he always claims that he doesn't have any socks, but I always claim that I have nothing to wear and clearly that is not true.
Counting cds and realizing that I never really listen to most of them, how did i end up with a will smith cd?

I should be looking for a new place for us to live but instead I am searching the Etsy website looking for stuff to decorate the above mentioned place to live, if there ever is one.
Do we take a crazy expensive 3 month lease till we figure stuff out or do we do some moving back in with parents thing to give our selves some breathing room and calm down a sec before we move in somewhere else. the discussions continue.
With all the craziness my baby hasn't napped in 3 days and i am happy to report that he is currently sleeping. i probably just jinxed myself and he will wake up any second but the laundry people are going to arrive soon anyway and I'd have to wake him up to go to the other apt. waking up a sleeping baby is so wrong.
Why he doesn't nap for any one but me i don't know and believe me i wish i could change it but it is what it is. he doesn't even nap when peter is home. only if its just the 2 of us. i guess i'm just not that interesting.