I'm done, stick a fork in me!

I've reached the stage of pregnancy when being comfortable is a full blown thing of the past. Sleeping, sitting, standing, it doesn't matter, its all uncomfortable. there is no relief.

I swear I'm getting bigger every few hrs.

If it wasn't for the whole "its too early for the baby to be born thing" I would try to start labor.

That and the fact that I haven't finished the sweater I'm knitting for her :) She can't come till its done cause once she arrives who knows the next time I'll be able to sit down and knit.

I'm all for natural etc. but the "placenta smoothie" recipe that my midwife gave me today has sorta ruined the word "smoothie" for me!

she predicts it will only be another 5-6 weeks till our little one arrives. excited to meet her but overwhelmed with all that still has to be accomplished before the EVENT!!

things you shouldn't say to a pregnant woman: the sequel!

man: WOW!! that's going to be one big baby cause you look HUGE!!! I mean you look really BIG!!

Um excuse me but did you leave the house without your meds today? Who the hell says that to another person, especially a pregnant hormonal pregnant woman!!!

What is wrong with people!!

things you shouldn't say/do to a pregnant woman!

Washing my hands in the restroom of a restaurant, the woman washing her hands next to me asks if I'm pregnant, then how far along I am, then spins me around and feels up my belly. Not put her hand on my belly, feels it up, molests, my belly. It was all so fast, it was so aggressive. I didn't have time to stop it, I didn't know what was going on. It was intrusive. Then it was over and she walked away. Just because I'm pregs doesn't mean that my boundaries 0f personal space have changed.

I want to get a shirt that says "hands off" or "ask first please" or "stay the fuck back" whatever, you get my meaning!!

In a store talking to a sales woman and mention that I'm pregnant. She says "really? How far along are you?" I tell her 6.5 months. She says "you're hardly showing. Most people probably just think you're chunky not pregnant". Um excuse me did you just call a pregnant lady fat? First let me say that I am indeed clearly pregnant, undeniably pregnant. The huge belly coming off my body should be the first indicator. Second, when someone tells you they are pregnant you should say the one thing that all pregnant women want to hear "YOU ARE ALL BELLY"!!!! Those words are powerful, they mean you haven't gained any weight except in your massive pregnant stomach and from the back I would never have know but from the front you are clearly beautifully blessed with child. How hard is it to say that. ready all together now "All Belly"!!! The words chunky, fat, large, surprisingly big etc should never be uttered to a pregnant woman!!!

So in closing: don't molest my baby bump and don't call me fat. Is that too much to ask?

moron

Skinny Maternity Jeans are an oxymoron

I'm a moron for buying them

And my moronic status is confirmed by the fact that I continue to put them on even though they are uncomfortable just because they look cute.

I'm 6 months pregnant for goodness sake I should be wearing my yoga pants every day with pride!!

you know its monday...........

Jonah is doing a great job of telling me when he has to pee, but he refuses to pee in his potty. That is for "little boys" he says. But apparently peeing in the shower is for "big boys". So he stands in the shower and pees. At least he's got the "I've got to go" thing right? Its kinda a pain in the ass though. I have to take off his pants and socks, then once he's done I have to wash his feet. But ok, he's peeing somewhere other than his diaper and I should be thankful...............right?

This morning, he said he had to pee, we went through the whole disrobing process and he peed. Great! Then he pooped. Ok, this has happened before, I just clean the shower. And lets be honest my shower doesn't usually get cleaned this often so maybe its a good thing? But today after he pooped in the shower, he decided to rub his feet in it, Ahhh no wait stop, Then he reached down and grabbed some and smeared it on him self, AHHHHHHHHHHH StOPPPPPPP, then he ran out of the shower and started smearing it everywhere in the bathroom, like seriously everywhere. OK. So I finally wrangle him get him up the stairs and into the upstairs shower since the downstairs one is out of commission!! We are both covered in poop, and um its super gross. But then we are clean and I think its all over.

I was feeling relieved. I forgot about what the bathroom looked like. But then I came back downstairs and it smacked me in the face. By this point the poop is dried and caked on to all the surfaces and I want to cry.

So happy Monday to you all. I hope yours is less poop filled than mine!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

life stuff

Buffalo chicken in the slow cooker. a new recipe that I've never tried. but at the beginning of this pregnancy I was on a huge blue cheese dressing kick and I need to use some of it up. So buffalo chicken for dinner it is!!

Jonah's bday party is in 2.5 weeks and I have done almost no planning for it. very unlike me!! I usually am making time lines by this point.

I am giving away all my size 2's and smaller. Lets be honest, I'm probably never going to fit into them again and there are plenty of people out there who could use them. But the size 4's them I'll keep :)

My closet has been cleaned out of all non maternity and huge sized clothing, from here on out its only the big stuff for me!